You Think Your Past Clients Don't Want to Hear From You. 5,900 People Say You're Wrong.

Here's the brutal truth about your database. You're not skipping those calls because you're busy. You're skipping them because you think the call will land as a bother.

The research says you're guessing wrong.

Peggy Liu at the University of Pittsburgh and three co-authors ran a series of experiments with more than 5,900 participants. In some, people sent a short note, or a note with a small gift, to someone in their circle they hadn't talked to in a while. Before it went out, senders rated how much they thought the recipient would appreciate it. Then the researchers asked the recipients.

Across every experiment, the senders underestimated it. Significantly.

But here's the part that matters for your business. The gap got bigger when the message was more surprising, and when the tie between the two people was weak. Recipients focused on the surprise. Senders didn't.

Think about what that means. The past client from 2019 you haven't spoken to in four years. The open-house visitor who never called back. Those are weak ties. Those are the exact people you're most wrong about.

One honest limit: the study looked at people with a history of positive interactions. It didn't test reaching out after a falling-out. So this isn't permission to call the client who fired you.

Do this today. Pull 10 names from your database you haven't contacted in over a year. Send each one a two-line text. No market update. No ask. "You popped into my head today. Hope you and the house are doing well."

Then count the replies.

Originally published by Peggy Liu, SoYon Rim, Lauren Min and Kate Min in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, via the American Psychological Association. Read the full piece here: https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2022/07/friends-enjoy-being-reached